Saturday, 03 March 2012
What’s tastier than peanut butter? Almond butter. The best almond butter? Justin’s Maple Almond Butter finds its way onto everything I eat. I can’t escape it. It makes its home on my English muffin, bagel, or toast in the morning.
At lunch, I can’t run away either. My carrots are clean and bare when I grab them. When I bite, almond butter is there. Apples fall victim as well. I rarely notice the sly almond butter sticking to the backside, hidden on my apple slices.
Spoons and almond butter need to be avoided at all costs. When I have a spoon in my right hand and a jar of Justin's in my left, an almond butter overdose is 110% likely.
Almond butter sneaks its way into your life and it takes over. It invaded my life. Whenever I eat, it’s there. I have an AB addiction. I’m a victim of the tasty, warm, and yet dangerous effects of almond butter.
I find myself unknowingly digging carrot sticks into open almond butter jars scrapping the the bare walls hoping there might be more. My hands have a mind of their own and almond butter is their master. After a veggie AB snack I'm scrapping the plate with my fork. If nobody's looking, I'm licking the plate clean. I can't afford to waste any.
Do I go to AB meetings? No. You may ask why not? I’ve never met anyone else who shares my addiction. And, who cares, almond butter is too, damn, good. Forget the naysayers. Their just jealous of my love for almond butter. Yes, it’s a close race, but for me Justin’s Maple Almond butter noses forward for the win against any peanut butter.
Do I have any suggestions to control an AB addiction? Yes, avoid at breakfast and limit to fruits and veggies.
Does anyone share my AB addiction? Or is it a PB addiction that controls your life? Have you been lucky enough to have Justin’s Maple Almond Butter? Do you have a jar of it in your home? Where do you live?